Perpetual+Essay+Feedback

Perpetual this is a good start to your essay. You ask an interesting question for you attention grabber and yet you only look at one half of it for the rest of your paragraph. If you are going to ask if it can be good and bad, you are going to have to consider both. You point out how it is good, but you have to show how it is bad because it helps us understand evil people. That also means you should look at both sides in your connection too. Yes empathy makes the jury feel sad for the father, but they knew that before Jake's speech. You need a few more sentences looking at how Jake's speech made the jury realize their own evil: their prejudice. How differently they felt for a black girl and a white girl. This can lead you to a much stronger thesis about the good and bad of empathy.


 * Level 2+**