Jenny+Essay+Feedback

Great start Jenny! Your AG is beautiful and perfect (level 4+). Your connection on the other hand is weak because you have NO CONNECTION. Instead of talking about 'nigger' and black people, try to find one song/movie/newspaper article that shows how words become physical, how we feel words. It is an amazing idea, but to understand how it works you need a real example to look at. By having a specific example this will also lead to a much stronger thesis. Without this you are left with Level 1- connection and thesis.


 * Overall: Level 2+**