Helen+Essay+Feedback

This is a good start to your essay. Your attention grabber is good but I think you can ask a better question to help with your connection. The question with your connection is there any value in understanding, or having empathy, for people who take advantage of us? Why is it important to understand why other's make bad decisions? What is more helpful: judging someone or understanding them? It is easy to hate them, but it is much harder to understand them. You don't have to answer all of these questions with your thesis, but show me that you considering them. It should make for a stronger thesis that will connect to TKMB.


 * Level 3-**