Vince+Essay+Feedback

Vince, you are off to a good start. First of all, have someone else read over your work for mistakes. You cannot 'explode' empathy (that means making it burst like a bomb), and the movie is called 'Time To Kill'. Little details make a big difference. the main thing you need to do to get to level 3 is start thinking about WHY it worked, how did empathy make a difference with the jury. How does empathy change people's minds? If you look at the jury you might be able to build an even stronger thesis to answer that question

Level **2+**